While there are very few guarantees in life and love, one thing’s for
sure. Along the road toward happily ever after, there will be plenty of
bumps. But that doesn’t necessarily make the journey unpleasant. In fact,
some of the lessons you learn in life and love may be hard to swallow, but
ultimately make you a stronger, healthier, and happier individual. What
follows are five hard-learned love lessons. See which ones you’ve already
encountered, as well as the ones you’ve yet to experience.
Lesson #1: Some Relationships are Temporary
When you acknowledge that some relationships are temporary, you learn
to stop blaming yourself for what you perceive as relationship failures. And
instead see them for what they are – valuable life lessons. It’s probably
clear that the relationships that ended were with partners who weren’t your
perfect match.
Maybe your personalities didn’t mesh, your goals and future vision were not
aligned, or your priorities conflicted. As painful as these breakups can be,
they happen for a reason. Not only that, but if you’re totally honest with
yourself, you’ll admit that you’re much better off as a result of the
relationship and breakup than you would have been had you never
experienced the love and loss in the first place.
Lesson #2: Learn/Apply your Lessons Quickly
Just as breakups happen for a reason, the lessons you learn as a result of
heartache are valuable as well. For example, you may never have known
the importance of being with someone who makes you a priority had you
not gone through a relationship where your partner put work, friends, and
hobbies before you. Or you may not have realized the importance of
healthy family relationships until you dated someone whose family life was
incredibly dysfunctional. Not only is it important to identify the lessons you
learn along the journey toward happily ever after, but you owe it to yourself
to apply the lessons learned, paying attention to red flags as they are
revealed to you in the future.
Lesson #3: Your partner Cannot fix you or your Life
Once upon a time, women were raised to believe that Prince Charming
would one day swoop in on a white steed and save them from whatever
they didn’t like about themselves or their lives. In fact, if your perfect
partner were to arrive in the middle of your messy and miserable life,
chances are he would make a hasty retreat. Which is why it’s essential to
take steps to fix whatever it is that you don’t enjoy about your life, starting
today. If you don’t like your job, do something about it. If you’re burdened
by debt, take steps to remedy the situation, day by day, week by week.
Don’t expect some guy to solve your problems or rescue you from your
everyday existence. It’s just not going to happen. Instead, it’s up to you to
rescue yourself.
Lesson #4: Figure out What Really Makes you Happy
Since it’s unlikely that your perfect partner will magically appear and save
the day, it’s essential that you figure out what makes you happy – today!
Once you do, empower yourself to take the necessary steps to change
your life accordingly. By creating and embracing a life you love, you’re all
the more likely to attract the love of your life. In doing so, you increase your
chances of relationship success, because both you and your partner were
happy as individuals before coming together as a couple.
Lesson #5: Time Between Relationships is just as Valuable as being
in a Relationship
We all know someone who floats from partner to partner, relationship to
relationship. However, this kind of behavior is not something to envy.
Truthfully, time between relationships is just as important to your personal
growth as time spent in relationships. By taking time after a breakup to
heal, learn your lessons, and get to know the new you that’s emerging as a
result of those life experiences, you give yourself the opportunity to grow as
an individual. Plus, you discover your own resilience, something you’d
never experience if you floated from partner to partner. It’s these life
lessons that ultimately make you a better person and eventually a better
partner in your next relationship. Don’t cheat yourself out of valuable ME
time between breakups. You’ll miss out on so much!
